anza borrego springs

last december, jake and i went for a spontaneous drive out to anza borrego to take pictures of the desert. we intended on making it all the way to the salton sea, but not realizing how long it would take us to get there (we took the route through Julian and stopped for a leisurely latte and their unbelievable doughnuts), we got over the mountain just in time to capture the fading light of the golden hour as it deepened the desert's colors before giving way to dusk.

del enjoyed this adventure as much as we did, but he was pretty bummed on all the stickers that i had to pull out of his paws with pliers. they were the gnarliest stickers i've ever seen...the size of lichi fruit and very lethal. he took it all in stride, however.

we also came home with a dutch apple pie from the infamous Julian PIE Company. i don't think i need to tell you that it was unbelievably good, so much so that we did not share with the neighbors.

you probably think i'm crazy

in my effort to be sophisticated and have 2 blogs (because 2 blogs is obviously better than 1), i have managed to completely confuse myself. initially only wanting a photo blog, i started color and texture when in india last year. but after returning home, i realized that i wanted another blog to write all manner of random things that quite simply, tickle my fancy for various reasons. thus, bits & pieces was born. but then i discovered that therein lies much crossover and so i started posting photo/random stories on each blog lest the reader miss something (i.e. my birthday cake posting which contained both photos of MA's amazing food, my mother's delicious cake and my narrative).

i'm going to do my best to keep them separate, so you just have to promise me that you (my trusted reader) will endeavor to visit both sites if you so choose. i, in turn, will promise to keep you entertained, or at least i shall try mightily. finally, i hereby declare that this shall be the last double posting in the hopes that you will cease asking yourself, "didn't i read this already?"

i may get older, but the cake gets sweeter...

MA was ever the gracious host of this year's carmel birthday, where we (MA, the bird...aka mom, and the birthday girl) proceeded to enjoy some fine champagne and all of MA's delicious fare.




MA's delicious mustard-heirloom tomato tart


bird's "bestest girlfriend" (and bird)



my birthday cake is somewhat of an awesome feat of tradition. my mother has so far made 32 of the most perfect carrot cakes ever created for me, and only me. while many people have begged her to make the cake for them, she steadfastly refuses (get your own cake!!!).

she has used the same bundt pan every single year, the same pan that as a child, seemed to weigh about a thousand pounds because it's the real deal. she NEVER uses said bundt pan for any other, let alone anyone else's cake.

the cake is moist on the inside and chewy around the edges and the frosting is perfect, tangy cream cheese with a hint of lemon. the sprinkles are ideally multi-colored as pictured here, but in a pinch, silver balls will do fine.

last year, there was a bit of carrot cake panic as the original recipe went missing. on a yellowing index card the ingredients are listed and instructions detailed in the admirable penmanship of my mother's 16-year old hand. the card had always lived in her recipe box until the previous year when she made the cake at my house. i treasured that card until i was forced against my will to give it back.

i look forward to this cake for the better part of each year, as do the many friends who have been fortunate enough to share it with me. some have even enjoyed it fedex'ed when time and space kept me and the bird apart.

thanks MA for the hospitality as always. and thanks birdy for always making me my special cake.

and to everyone else, get in line!

note for the reader...

i've decided to move all non-travel musings to bits & pieces. enjoy!

flame, the lotus & rebirth...

after an all too long hiatus filled with stress and challenge, an arduous move to silver lake (i.e. a million trips up 53 steep stairs from hell, only to be welcomed on the first night by gunshots far too close for comfort) and a case of itchy fingers...the blog finally got the best of me. it took some racking of the brain to remember my login name, but i reign victorious and so here i am.

it's been almost 6 months exactly to the day since i last wrote about my final day in delhi, and 6 months later, the experience is still fresh and alive in my mind. jake and i have noticed, on more than one occasion, the many similarities between LA and delhi...the burdensome traffic, the throbbing sounds of too many souls packed together like sardines, the brown haze of pollution, the sheer weight of humanity. and much to my delight, the corner liquor store proprietors are all indian and love to chat. as i made my purchases this afternoon, the gentleman clerk came alive telling me of the graciousness of his country. while putting the nag champa into my bag, he asked,
'are you needing matches?'
'no, thank you'
'how will you be lighting them?'
'i have a lighter at home'
'i see', he replied. followed by a pregnant pause. 'in my country, we are never lighting the (rattling off a word that sounded nothing like nag champa but was nonetheless amazing in its melody) with something unnatural. we are using it to clean out the bad energy and we are only using natural flame. so here are some matches. use them, don't use them. you can be using whatever you want'
i took the matches and began a new ritual.

which got me to thinking about all things 'natural'...

the environment is finally being given the consideration it deserves these days and thankfully so. i've become obsessive with my recycling efforts and minimizing my carbon emissions (love gozero!). i take my own bags to trader joe's and find myself wanting to give the thumbs-up to anyone driving a hybrid. i like to think of it as my own personal renaissance...a return to the principles to which i was totally devoted to when i was 18...the preservation and responsible stewardship of the natural world. that was 14 years ago. what went wrong in the interim?

i have a lot of excuses and none worth detailing here. i'm disappointed in this lengthy lapse of judgement. but that's not to say that i was completely out of the loop, just not as committed as i should have been. collectively as a human race and personally as belonging to one of the most polluting industrial nations in the world, i can't think of a better time to regard the natural world and the fragile ecosystems that surround us. i'm beyond disappointed at american corporations' insistence on exploiting the planet, like finding ways to justify blasting off the tops of mountains to 'mine' for coal (in fact, don't even get me started on coal and its consequences). at the risk of sounding like too much of a west coast hippie, it's so obvious to me that there is a balance to be struck between using resources responsibly and protecting the environment for future generations. surely it's possible to further technological advances while also acting as the guardians of the natural world without having to grow dreads or start wearing birkenstocks. i struggle with the notion that as humans, we are a natural organism. how then can we then get so far off the mark and ignore the devastation we wreak in pursuit of the perfect SUV experience?

which brings me back to the liquor store, my new bob marley matches and strangely enough, india...

india: so beautiful and yet so tragically polluted. the land of trash fires and plastic bags buried feet deep within mounds of earth for as far as the eye can see. and yet despite the haze floating densely above new delhi, even the simplest gesture of lighting a stick of incense with a natural flame is revered...if that isn't a maddening duality, i don't know what is. and maybe that's exactly what india taught me and what i continue to learn even at home...to live with both and strive for understanding.

which now brings me to the lotus...

the lotus blooms in even the most polluted environments, thriving in muddied, shallow waters and yet is unquestionably a symbol of beauty, not to mention an iconic symbol of tranquility. now i'm not suggesting that we can continue at this self-destructive pace and expect to suddenly bloom a devistatingly gorgeous flower from the muck. i'm thinking more along the lines of making something negative, positive. maybe it just took moving to my own new delhi to be passionate again about preservation.

the last day

these pics were taken out on the busy street running past our hotel. as we got out of our auto, we heard drums and chanting and raced up to the street to see what was going on. a few tour buses and trucks bearing festival devotees had pulled off to the side, a handful of people had jumped out and started an impromptu drum-dancing circle. we gladly snapped up some pictures and just as quickly as they had arrived, they rounded everyone back up and into their caravan (at the behest of local law enforcement) and were on their way.

a few more images from the last couple of hours spent in delhi before our flight home...

intense longing...

it's been 119 hours since we got back to california and i can safely say that i have spent at least 100 of them missing india. even in my sleep. i've dreampt of exploding lotus fireworks in pinks, purples and greens. when i close my eyes before bed, bursts of memory flash in front of my lids reminding me of the food vendors, animals, peeling paint and bright saris.




gate to private residence, kailash colony, new delhi


shoppers at dilli haat, new delhi


transportation of choice, new delhi


village women, east of fatepuhr sikri


19 year old silk vendor at dilli haat, new delhi


lime soda vendor outside of chadni chowk, new delhi


pedicab, new delhi


goat, fatepuhr sikri


sweet potatoes at jonpath, new delhi


paddle boats at delhi gate, new delhi


last night as i walked del through my almost unbearably quiet neighborhood, a distinct fragrance enveloped me, and mixed with the exhaust of a very late school bus, emulated the ubiquitous scent of delhi...spice and pollution.

i went back to work on monday and was faced with a challenge: teaching 90 high school students about restorative justice and the juvenile justice system when really all i wanted to do was set up my slideshow of photos, settle into my comfy armchair and drink chai. luckily the students were freshman and i always appreciate their naivete and enthusiasm. they wanted to know about india, how different it is from the US and whether i liked it. i told them of the poverty, the animals, the pollution, the rich history and architecture. i told them that you can't drink the water unless it comes from a sealed water bottle, that excursions are often planned around finding a bathroom, and that ordering food is an adventure when you only know that 'aloo' means potato and 'matar' green peas. i told them that not only did i like india, i fell in love with all its complexities. i told them that the experience had profoundly changed my concept of privelege...that even the most destitute people in our community have no idea what it's like to be poor in india. i told them that even though they might not have the coolest tshirts from hot topic, that they have more clothes than some children in india could ever dream of having. before my trip, i may have looked at some of those very students and thought, 'these kids live below the poverty level'. but after india, all i could see were incredibly healthy and fortunate people who will eat today.

it was hard to teach and stay on task when really all i wanted to say was, 'who cares about these issues...people are DYING on the sides of the road from starvation...children are begging in traffic with bloody stumps for hands and huge scars marring their faces!' in contrast, improving the justice system doesn't seem nearly as urgent anymore.

whoa...culture shock...

back at the singapore airport...total culture shock. everything is clean and sanitary, bright flashing lights beckoning me to shop in all the duty free stores. everything my little ol' heart desires and more. only this time my entire concept of money has changed and the prices are enough to give me a heart attack! but little did i know that they have a mac counter. lord help me! only 20 more hours until i'm stateside!!!

a fond farewell...

with a somewhat heavy heart i bid farewell to india...while i'm very much looking forward to the conveniences of home (FRESH fruits and vegetables by the ton...clean/safe running water...a HOT shower for the first time in 3 weeks...no raw sewage running along the roadside...not feeling like a total alien with three heads, etc.) i'm also a bit reluctant to leave.

everyday has been different...some trying and difficult at best. some frustrating and downright miserable for various reasons (mostly physical discomfort). but others have been absolutely amazing and beautiful, rich and magical...full of color and detail that will stay with me for a long, long time.

i'll miss the cacophony of traffic, the green parakeets flying wildly through the neighborhood, chai 4 times a day, the great food, terrific shopping, the vibrant colors everywhere, neemrana's fort palace, the children, music, and cows wandering lazily through intersections and marketplace. in short...just about everything. even the things that drive me crazy one day seem endearing the next.

we spent the day yesterday at a photoshoot for cigarettes in a posh club here in new delhi. the ads were running in africa where actual cigarettes are not allowed to be shown in the advertisement. we holed up in the club all day. and the models smoked. all day. and danced somewhat reluctantly as will smith's 'gettin jiggy with it' played on repeat for 6 hours. but it reminded me of what jake really came here to do...work. it was an interesting experience, especially to watch tarun. he is so full of energy and passion. it illustrated what an amazing time this has been...our experiences have been so diverse and at times complicated.













afterwards we set out to get some last minute shopping taken care of, and stopped by india gate...we were beseiged by monkey handlers, children trying to sell us all manner of things, and curious delhiites. two of the particularly rambunctious boys hijacked one of the paddle boats and much to the dismay of the protesting onlookers, sailed off laughing hysterically.





as jake put it last night..."i kinda looked at this in the beginning like, 'great...after this, india will be taken care of...i can cross that off my list of places in the world to go'...but now i know that i want to come back again and again". we saw and experienced a great deal, but there is still so much to be explored. i'm looking forward to the next time.

(but i'm also looking forward to sleeping in my own bed in about 48 hours and giving my dog a big fat kiss!)

namaste.

peace of mind...

here are some pictures of the bahai temple that we visited before the ram leela grounds...it is a nondenominational temple that was completed in the late '80s as a common ground for people of any religion to convene and meditate, pray or simply observe the amazing silence allowed by the expansive architecture. it is another sanctuary within the controlled chaos of new delhi.

when we arrived, hundreds of people proceeded slowly toward the temple, removed their shoes and filed in silently to sit on the many wooden carved benches and do as they pleased, so long as they didn't disturb the peace within. the only sounds we heard were the soft jinglings of anklets worn by many of the women. photography was not allowed inside so you'll just have to use your imagination! this was one of my favorite places...